Getting Tested

This morning I drove over to Wheaton College and picked up a good friend, one of my former students, and we headed over on a very cold Chicago morning to the DuPage County Health Department offices. We had both been there before to get shots before heading to Africa, but this visit was a little different. We were there to take an HIV test so we would know our status in relationship to having the presence of HIV antibodies on our body. Now to be honest, both of us admittedly felt a bit strange doing this at first. And even for many who might regularly read this blog you may very well think that it was an even stranger thing for us to do.

It was something that both of us wanted to do and felt like we needed to do as people who have been and continue to be deeply concerned about the issue of HIV/AIDS both in Africa and here in America. And yet to be honest, as an evangelical Christian it might seem to many of my friends like something unnecessary or perhaps even unthinkable due to the nature of the HIV virus being most often transmitted here in America through sexual contact or intravenous drug use involving needles due to most of the cases of mother to child transmission through birth or breast milk being prevented through medical care. (although not always the case) We both essentially had zero risk factors for testing positive because of our lack of drug use and choosing to abstain from sex till marriage and only having sex with a spouse for a lifetime up till this point. These decisions have come from our own decisions to seek to with the help of God's grace to pursue this lifestyle out of what we believe our faith as a Christ follower calls us to do. And yet these lifestyle choices are obviously not shared or embraced or acted out by many of our friends and fellow human beings who we love, care about, and want to be healthy...

We have both seen and heard about the incredible fear and stigma and even discrimination that takes place with those who are HIV positive, along with the very real physical impact and suffering that many living with HIV or AIDS are experiencing worldwide...more than anything else related to this disease, I long for the prevention of contracting AIDS and to stop its spread for people both in Africa and here in the USA and Chicago...and for those who are HIV positive but do not know it yet I want them to immediately get the medicines needed to help them stay healthy and be able to feel good about themselves and their role in society...and these critical things cannot happen if people do not feel free or comfortable to get tested and know their own status...and if people like me and you are willing to get tested, we can make it more normal, more accepted, and less scary for anyone who wants to know if they are HIV positive, and even more acceptable to talk about this disease so we can help reduce the infection rate of this life-changing disease...

Here is my experience this morning...even as we walked into the health department building, I found myself three times in a row having to tell different folks that I wanted to get an HIV test, and wondering just a bit what they were thinking about me...but to be honest, I didn't feel hesitant or ashamed because I knew it was a good thing for me to do...I was brought into a private room and was asked a series of questions concerning my risk factors and given basic information about HIV and what would happen if the result was positive...they even took down my address because sometimes people don't stay around to hear the results in the 20 minute period while you wait for your results...my counselor was a very nice young lady who seemed both surprised and pleased at how I answered the questions about my sexual experiences and needle use...I know she was actually quite overwhelmed when my 21 year old friend told her he was a virgin...after a finger poke I walked out to the waiting area where she would come find me with the results after the 20 minutes needed to do the analysis of my blood in a quick rapid test...(by the way, the test was free, I was treated very well, and I just walked in and was out in under an hour)

As I sat in the waiting room chair I thought and chatted with my friend about what these moments must feel like for those who were unsure or fearful about what the results might show...results that have life long implications...we thought about our Zambian friends who don't want to get tested if there are not medications available or the hidden lifestyle choices that might be revealed and disapproved of in DuPage County by people they are close to in their lives...it served as an experience producing empathy and understanding for those who may be dealing with the impact of this virus...and hopefully produces an opportunity to speak into the lives of those who may need to be tested and helps encourage all types of folks to get tested and know their status and reduce the stigma that still unfortunately is part of cultures all across the world...

My counselor motioned for me to go back into the room with her and she asked me to sit down and looked at my results one more time...there was a split second where I found myself wondering "WHAT IF" even on a personal level before she told me my result was that I was negative in terms of my HIV status...and despite the fact that I knew logically that would be the case, it again allowed me to experience a taste of what it feels like to be that person wondering in that moment...as I walked out of the office after thanking her for the service she had provided me there were a few things that stuck with me after getting tested:

1. It is powerful and meaningful to enter into positive shared experiences so we can build rapport and get on the same ground when we have opportunity to not stay at a distance from those who we care about but may have different life experiences...

2. Getting tested and discovering your status in terms of HIV is easy to do and is something everyone should consider doing, especially if you have any doubt about what your status might be, regardless of what you think others might think of your behavioral choices

3. Choosing to live by the vision God has set out in Scripture for relationships is an aid in maintaining health and peace in our own personal lives

4. AIDS is an issue that we must not ignore in Africa, in Washington DC, in our own neighborhood...it deserves our attention, education, compassion, and action...

5. You cannot live life based on the fears of what others might think about you when you know you should do the right thing regardless of their possible reaction and response...living in the light rather than the dark is always the best choice...

It was a morning I won't soon forget...and one I hope many others will soon count as a shared experience with me in the days to come...