So as this year draws to a close, it is exciting to be in a different place than last year in many ways...as 2009 ended it was very much about seeing where we had come from and all the differences and changes that were now present in our lives...and now a year later I find myself not looking back so often but instead looking forward to new things that will happen in our lives and some goals and visions I am seeking to pursue and make reality in 2011...so here goes the target list for 2011 with 11 things I long for God to help me chase after in the coming 365 days of a new year:
1. Embrace a new level of simplicity...I want to take real steps in not buying, accumulating, and spending time with stuff that I don't need and ultimately adds very little real meaning and joy to my life...and I long to teach my kids how to spend less so we can give more in a better way...
2. Read more and watch video less...I need more time with written words rather than just pictures and voices on a screen...
3. Don't be controlled by fears...I find myself as I get older being more consumed by the uncertainties and challenges of life, and I need to embrace more fully the measure of contentment and confidence I have as one who has a God who is intimately concerned and involved in even my life...
4. Run almost every day for the sake of my physical, mental, and spiritual health...this time in the day is critical for me in each of these dimensions...
5. Allow the Scriptures to be present and central in my thoughts and mind...to read the Bible, to memorize its life-giving words, and to listen to others teach from it in a systematic and central way in my daily routines...
6. Write more notes to my colleagues, my friends, and my family...simply because I love to write and I believe deeply in the power of encouragement and belief in the lives of those God has put in my life...
7. Manage my sports obsession and love of all things athletic...I can so easily divert my attention from the people and things that matter most to the games that matter not as much...and I have a little guy who I am training in this regard every single day...
8. Be more honest with my feelings with others...at times my desire to create peace and to promote happy and healthy relationships causes me to hide my true emotions and thoughts for the sake of not rocking the boat...and I need to invite more feedback from those I lead and serve in various arenas in my life...
9. Be less accessible and available when I need to be fully present with key people in my life...I struggle to not fall prey to electronic demands when I should be focused on the situations and people right in front of me...
10. Discover the best places outside of the Cornerstone community where I can invest my time and gifts for the furthering of the Kingdom of God...and I can't be afraid to invite others to come together to help facilitate real change in this world...
11. Finish the writing, editing, and publishing of the book I have been writing about my life and student engagement in the Zambia Project and beyond...it is time to get it done and time to get it out...and will require that which I find often to be so hard to do...but by the end of 2011, I want to be holding this book in my hand...and let the story God has been writing be known...
With prayers for courage and discipline and focus to pursue these dreams and passions God's Spirit has been stirring in my heart...here's to a new year indeed!
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Be Rich This Christmas by Andy Stanley
I know some people who are great at getting rich. But when it comes to being rich, I'm less than impressed.
In their defense, they have many problems non-rich people don't have. For instance, they need to come up with a retirement plan to ensure their golden years really are golden. I know lots of people who are faced with decisions about trading in slightly used cars, remodeling a room of their house, or upgrading to the latest, largest LCD. And who doesn't have a hard time planning how or where to spend their two weeks of paid vacation?
These are rich people problems. I have them. And my guess is one of these sounds familiar to you too.
Don't think you're rich? If you earn more than $37,000 a year, you are in the top four percent of wage earners—in the world. Congratulations! You're rich.
The thing is, "rich" is a moving target. When you were 16, $37,000 would have made you feel rich. A mortgage, a few kids, and two cars later, the same can't be said.
Throughout our lives we aspire to earn more money and accumulate more stuff. But when we earn more and collect more, our desire for more just grows.
What if we spent less time worrying about getting rich and more time and energy being rich?
The average American spends 67 days every year watching TV, but only 48 hours serving others. This December, are you focused on getting rich or being rich?
Let me help you shift gears this Christmas. Support a cause. Be rich.
In their defense, they have many problems non-rich people don't have. For instance, they need to come up with a retirement plan to ensure their golden years really are golden. I know lots of people who are faced with decisions about trading in slightly used cars, remodeling a room of their house, or upgrading to the latest, largest LCD. And who doesn't have a hard time planning how or where to spend their two weeks of paid vacation?
These are rich people problems. I have them. And my guess is one of these sounds familiar to you too.
Don't think you're rich? If you earn more than $37,000 a year, you are in the top four percent of wage earners—in the world. Congratulations! You're rich.
The thing is, "rich" is a moving target. When you were 16, $37,000 would have made you feel rich. A mortgage, a few kids, and two cars later, the same can't be said.
Throughout our lives we aspire to earn more money and accumulate more stuff. But when we earn more and collect more, our desire for more just grows.
What if we spent less time worrying about getting rich and more time and energy being rich?
The average American spends 67 days every year watching TV, but only 48 hours serving others. This December, are you focused on getting rich or being rich?
Let me help you shift gears this Christmas. Support a cause. Be rich.
Monday, December 6, 2010
A Chapel Message on the Incarnation: GOD WANTS YOU ON THE FLOOR
Here's some notes from my latest chapel talk at CU...
Implications of the Incarnation:
A Journey from Spectator to Participant in God’s Kingdom Ventures
The Power of Jesus’ Engagement:
JOHN 1:14…
The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.
HEBREWS 2:14-18
Because God’s children are human beings—made of flesh and blood—the Son also became flesh and blood. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the devil, who had the power of death. Only in this way could he set free all who have lived their lives as slaves to the fear of dying. We also know that the Son did not come to help angels; he came to help the descendants of Abraham. Therefore, it was necessary for him to be made in every respect like us, his brothers and sisters, so that he could be our merciful and faithful High Priest before God. Then he could offer a sacrifice that would take away the sins of the people. Since he himself has gone through suffering and testing, he is able to help us when we are being tested.
Some of the differences between the bench and the field…
*Watching things happen vs. determining the outcome
*Making comments about what is wrong vs. being part of a solution
*Wishing you could be part of something cool vs. living out a Kingdom-sized dream
An Old Testament Model…
NEHEMIAH 4:13-23:
So I stationed armed guards at the most vulnerable places of the wall and assigned people by families with their swords, lances, and bows. After looking things over I stood up and spoke to the nobles, officials, and everyone else: "Don't be afraid of them. Put your minds on the Master, great and awesome, and then fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes." Our enemies learned that we knew all about their plan and that God had frustrated it. And we went back to the wall and went to work. From then on half of my young men worked while the other half stood guard with lances, shields, bows, and mail armor. Military officers served as backup for everyone in Judah who was at work rebuilding the wall. The common laborers held a tool in one hand and a spear in the other. Each of the builders had a sword strapped to his side as he worked. I kept the trumpeter at my side to sound the alert. Then I spoke to the nobles and officials and everyone else: "There's a lot of work going on and we are spread out all along the wall, separated from each other. When you hear the trumpet call, join us there; our God will fight for us.“ And so we kept working, from first light until the stars came out, half of us holding lances. I also instructed the people, "Each person and his helper is to stay inside Jerusalem—guards by night and workmen by day." We all slept in our clothes—I, my brothers, my workmen, and the guards backing me up. And each one kept his spear in his hand, even when getting water.
Three factors that keep us sitting getting spiritual splinters…
*DIFFERENT REPUTATION
*RELATIONSHIP RISKS
*FAILURE
ACTS 17:6
“Paul and Silas have turned the rest of the world upside down, and now they are here disturbing our city,” they shouted.
God wants you ON THE FLOOR
*Are you watching God’s work in the world or are you part of His Kingdom strategy being fleshed out among His people?
*Where do you currently need to get into the game and take advantage of a clear opportunity you have to use your gifts to change people’s lives and the world for Jesus’ sake?
Implications of the Incarnation:
A Journey from Spectator to Participant in God’s Kingdom Ventures
The Power of Jesus’ Engagement:
JOHN 1:14…
The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.
HEBREWS 2:14-18
Because God’s children are human beings—made of flesh and blood—the Son also became flesh and blood. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the devil, who had the power of death. Only in this way could he set free all who have lived their lives as slaves to the fear of dying. We also know that the Son did not come to help angels; he came to help the descendants of Abraham. Therefore, it was necessary for him to be made in every respect like us, his brothers and sisters, so that he could be our merciful and faithful High Priest before God. Then he could offer a sacrifice that would take away the sins of the people. Since he himself has gone through suffering and testing, he is able to help us when we are being tested.
Some of the differences between the bench and the field…
*Watching things happen vs. determining the outcome
*Making comments about what is wrong vs. being part of a solution
*Wishing you could be part of something cool vs. living out a Kingdom-sized dream
An Old Testament Model…
NEHEMIAH 4:13-23:
So I stationed armed guards at the most vulnerable places of the wall and assigned people by families with their swords, lances, and bows. After looking things over I stood up and spoke to the nobles, officials, and everyone else: "Don't be afraid of them. Put your minds on the Master, great and awesome, and then fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes." Our enemies learned that we knew all about their plan and that God had frustrated it. And we went back to the wall and went to work. From then on half of my young men worked while the other half stood guard with lances, shields, bows, and mail armor. Military officers served as backup for everyone in Judah who was at work rebuilding the wall. The common laborers held a tool in one hand and a spear in the other. Each of the builders had a sword strapped to his side as he worked. I kept the trumpeter at my side to sound the alert. Then I spoke to the nobles and officials and everyone else: "There's a lot of work going on and we are spread out all along the wall, separated from each other. When you hear the trumpet call, join us there; our God will fight for us.“ And so we kept working, from first light until the stars came out, half of us holding lances. I also instructed the people, "Each person and his helper is to stay inside Jerusalem—guards by night and workmen by day." We all slept in our clothes—I, my brothers, my workmen, and the guards backing me up. And each one kept his spear in his hand, even when getting water.
Three factors that keep us sitting getting spiritual splinters…
*DIFFERENT REPUTATION
*RELATIONSHIP RISKS
*FAILURE
ACTS 17:6
“Paul and Silas have turned the rest of the world upside down, and now they are here disturbing our city,” they shouted.
God wants you ON THE FLOOR
*Are you watching God’s work in the world or are you part of His Kingdom strategy being fleshed out among His people?
*Where do you currently need to get into the game and take advantage of a clear opportunity you have to use your gifts to change people’s lives and the world for Jesus’ sake?
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Some Thoughts on Being a Sports Fan Who Follows Jesus
Today's the first home game for the CU men's hoops team...we have a fabulous team this year and my family and I love being fans at their games in the long Midwest winters...here's my latest editorial writing for the CU school paper on what is means to be a fan at CU...off to cheer on the Golden Eagles...
If you were to ask me what some of my favorite memories of my first 16 months on the CU campus are, I’d be able to share all kinds of stories about Terra Firma events, global justice awareness activities, meals in the dining hall, meaningful classroom interactions, and hundreds of meetings and conversations with staff and students in the CU community.
However, I’d also have to tell you that my CU highlight moments include plenty of time spent in the bleachers or on the sidelines of our CU athletic fields. I am a sports junkie/nerd who is perfectly content attending and watching any kind of athletic contest, except for horse racing or NASCAR races; I think it has something to do with the lack of human movement and the lack of presence of a ball or other object being moved around! The sad truth is that I’m well on my way to raising another generation of this type of passionate sports fan, and one of my most distinct CU memories is my seven year old son waving his gold CU spirit towel right in Dr. Ostrander’s face at the WHAC Basketball Championship Game last March!
I love athletics, love hanging out with athletes, and love being a CU fan. But I also sometimes wonder how my faith and my being a fan are connected in my life. I’ve actually pondered questions like “Does God care about how we cheer at games? Can Christians really care passionately about the outcome of sporting events? How does the fact that I am part of the CU community influence what I choose to do at the athletic contests I attend?” I am fully aware that thinking about these questions may not be normal, but as I’ve reflected on them I think they really are worth consideration in an American culture that reveres and is in many ways fixated with its athletic events.
So here are a few thoughts in response to those questions as we consider what it means to be a CU fan…
1. It is a good thing to attend and be engaged at our sporting events! There is a powerful sense of community that is developed at these events and your presence and participation makes a huge impact on the lives of hundreds of students on our campus who are passionately pursuing the calling God has invited them to pursue with the gifts and passions He’s placed in their lives. It is so appropriate to be there in big numbers and to be there with loud voices!
2. I believe that the best kind of cheering focuses on celebrating what our teams and athletes do well. Your energy and feedback can and does stir them to continue to pursue excellence and often helps them sustain their effort when they are fatigued or struggling at a moment in the match or event. I know that there is an incredible temptation to focus our energy and words on the negative things that the other team’s players are doing. I’ve seen and laughed at the crazy ways crowds on TV and in other settings have tried to distract, intimidate and even humiliate athletes on opposing teams. But I’m always drawn to the fact that there is a person behind the player, and I’m convinced that the words of Scripture paint a picture where God loves when our words inspire and encourage rather than potentially harm or damage, even in the heat of competition.
I love the words of Solomon in Proverbs 16:24 (NIV): “Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”
3. There is a unique reality as a Christian community that how we compete and cheer and what we do as fans does represent who Jesus is to the folks from outside our community who are playing and watching along with us in athletic settings. I’ve received more than enough letters and emails from people after games as an administrator and coach that have made me quite certain that they definitely are watching us as Christians in that context. It might seem a bit unfair or judgmental to us, but it also is a reality that offers us an incredible opportunity to demonstrate what the character and nature of Christ looks like. We simply are different as a community of fans because we proclaim Jesus as Lord of our lives. Our culture and other spectators can form impressions of both Christ and His church from coming to a game against Cornerstone University. That is an incredible opportunity for us to bless people and honor Christ in this competitive cauldron. It’s one I am excited about and hope you will embrace as you live out your college life and your faith as a CU fan.
I resonate with the vision Paul offers for us in Philippians 2:13-14 (Message): “Do everything readily and cheerfully—no bickering, no second-guessing allowed! Go out into the world uncorrupted, a breath of fresh air in this squalid and polluted society. Provide people with a glimpse of good living and of the living God.”
I just finished watching a fall season of great crowds at soccer and volleyball and cross country events; and the winter months promise some incredible basketball action from some very good CU squads; and there’s new softball fan seating awaiting us in the spring…
I’ll look forward to seeing you cheering long and loud at these unique CU events, and I’m praying the world will see Jesus in us and through us as we live out the calling of being Christian fans…
GO CU!
If you were to ask me what some of my favorite memories of my first 16 months on the CU campus are, I’d be able to share all kinds of stories about Terra Firma events, global justice awareness activities, meals in the dining hall, meaningful classroom interactions, and hundreds of meetings and conversations with staff and students in the CU community.
However, I’d also have to tell you that my CU highlight moments include plenty of time spent in the bleachers or on the sidelines of our CU athletic fields. I am a sports junkie/nerd who is perfectly content attending and watching any kind of athletic contest, except for horse racing or NASCAR races; I think it has something to do with the lack of human movement and the lack of presence of a ball or other object being moved around! The sad truth is that I’m well on my way to raising another generation of this type of passionate sports fan, and one of my most distinct CU memories is my seven year old son waving his gold CU spirit towel right in Dr. Ostrander’s face at the WHAC Basketball Championship Game last March!
I love athletics, love hanging out with athletes, and love being a CU fan. But I also sometimes wonder how my faith and my being a fan are connected in my life. I’ve actually pondered questions like “Does God care about how we cheer at games? Can Christians really care passionately about the outcome of sporting events? How does the fact that I am part of the CU community influence what I choose to do at the athletic contests I attend?” I am fully aware that thinking about these questions may not be normal, but as I’ve reflected on them I think they really are worth consideration in an American culture that reveres and is in many ways fixated with its athletic events.
So here are a few thoughts in response to those questions as we consider what it means to be a CU fan…
1. It is a good thing to attend and be engaged at our sporting events! There is a powerful sense of community that is developed at these events and your presence and participation makes a huge impact on the lives of hundreds of students on our campus who are passionately pursuing the calling God has invited them to pursue with the gifts and passions He’s placed in their lives. It is so appropriate to be there in big numbers and to be there with loud voices!
2. I believe that the best kind of cheering focuses on celebrating what our teams and athletes do well. Your energy and feedback can and does stir them to continue to pursue excellence and often helps them sustain their effort when they are fatigued or struggling at a moment in the match or event. I know that there is an incredible temptation to focus our energy and words on the negative things that the other team’s players are doing. I’ve seen and laughed at the crazy ways crowds on TV and in other settings have tried to distract, intimidate and even humiliate athletes on opposing teams. But I’m always drawn to the fact that there is a person behind the player, and I’m convinced that the words of Scripture paint a picture where God loves when our words inspire and encourage rather than potentially harm or damage, even in the heat of competition.
I love the words of Solomon in Proverbs 16:24 (NIV): “Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”
3. There is a unique reality as a Christian community that how we compete and cheer and what we do as fans does represent who Jesus is to the folks from outside our community who are playing and watching along with us in athletic settings. I’ve received more than enough letters and emails from people after games as an administrator and coach that have made me quite certain that they definitely are watching us as Christians in that context. It might seem a bit unfair or judgmental to us, but it also is a reality that offers us an incredible opportunity to demonstrate what the character and nature of Christ looks like. We simply are different as a community of fans because we proclaim Jesus as Lord of our lives. Our culture and other spectators can form impressions of both Christ and His church from coming to a game against Cornerstone University. That is an incredible opportunity for us to bless people and honor Christ in this competitive cauldron. It’s one I am excited about and hope you will embrace as you live out your college life and your faith as a CU fan.
I resonate with the vision Paul offers for us in Philippians 2:13-14 (Message): “Do everything readily and cheerfully—no bickering, no second-guessing allowed! Go out into the world uncorrupted, a breath of fresh air in this squalid and polluted society. Provide people with a glimpse of good living and of the living God.”
I just finished watching a fall season of great crowds at soccer and volleyball and cross country events; and the winter months promise some incredible basketball action from some very good CU squads; and there’s new softball fan seating awaiting us in the spring…
I’ll look forward to seeing you cheering long and loud at these unique CU events, and I’m praying the world will see Jesus in us and through us as we live out the calling of being Christian fans…
GO CU!
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Remembering Getting Tested for HIV on World AIDS Day
It is World AIDS Day again...a day that has become a key one on my calendar over the last several years...I find myself wearing orange orphan shirts and almost always am involved with some meaningful awareness and response events on campuses with my students...and today is no exception at Cornerstone...and as I was thinking about the impact of this pandemic on so many people near and far I call friends in our world, I remembered one of my most poignant encounters with HIV...and one of the most meaningful and motivating...so below is a post from a couple years ago I wrote after getting tested for HIV a few years ago at a local clinic...may we see what I posted as my facebook picture become reality as we promote testing and prevention and treatment even still today so that no children will be born in 2015 with a positive HIV status...I'm off to get ready for a good day here thinking of God's invitation to love and care and support those impact now and in the future...
This morning I drove over to Wheaton College and picked up a good friend, one of my former students, and we headed over on a very cold Chicago morning to the DuPage County Health Department offices. We had both been there before to get shots before heading to Africa, but this visit was a little different. We were there to take an HIV test so we would know our status in relationship to having the presence of HIV antibodies on our body. Now to be honest, both of us admittedly felt a bit strange doing this at first. And even for many who might regularly read this blog you may very well think that it was an even stranger thing for us to do.
It was something that both of us wanted to do and felt like we needed to do as people who have been and continue to be deeply concerned about the issue of HIV/AIDS both in Africa and here in America. And yet to be honest, as an evangelical Christian it might seem to many of my friends like something unnecessary or perhaps even unthinkable due to the nature of the HIV virus being most often transmitted here in America through sexual contact or intravenous drug use involving needles due to most of the cases of mother to child transmission through birth or breast milk being prevented through medical care. (although not always the case) We both essentially had zero risk factors for testing positive because of our lack of drug use and choosing to abstain from sex till marriage and only having sex with a spouse for a lifetime up till this point. These decisions have come from our own decisions to seek to with the help of God's grace to pursue this lifestyle out of what we believe our faith as a Christ follower calls us to do. And yet these lifestyle choices are obviously not shared or embraced or acted out by many of our friends and fellow human beings who we love, care about, and want to be healthy...
We have both seen and heard about the incredible fear and stigma and even discrimination that takes place with those who are HIV positive, along with the very real physical impact and suffering that many living with HIV or AIDS are experiencing worldwide...more than anything else related to this disease, I long for the prevention of contracting AIDS and to stop its spread for people both in Africa and here in the USA and Chicago...and for those who are HIV positive but do not know it yet I want them to immediately get the medicines needed to help them stay healthy and be able to feel good about themselves and their role in society...and these critical things cannot happen if people do not feel free or comfortable to get tested and know their own status...and if people like me and you are willing to get tested, we can make it more normal, more accepted, and less scary for anyone who wants to know if they are HIV positive, and even more acceptable to talk about this disease so we can help reduce the infection rate of this life-changing disease...
Here is my experience this morning...even as we walked into the health department building, I found myself three times in a row having to tell different folks that I wanted to get an HIV test, and wondering just a bit what they were thinking about me...but to be honest, I didn't feel hesitant or ashamed because I knew it was a good thing for me to do...I was brought into a private room and was asked a series of questions concerning my risk factors and given basic information about HIV and what would happen if the result was positive...they even took down my address because sometimes people don't stay around to hear the results in the 20 minute period while you wait for your results...my counselor was a very nice young lady who seemed both surprised and pleased at how I answered the questions about my sexual experiences and needle use...I know she was actually quite overwhelmed when my 21 year old friend told her he was a virgin...after a finger poke I walked out to the waiting area where she would come find me with the results after the 20 minutes needed to do the analysis of my blood in a quick rapid test...(by the way, the test was free, I was treated very well, and I just walked in and was out in under an hour)
As I sat in the waiting room chair I thought and chatted with my friend about what these moments must feel like for those who were unsure or fearful about what the results might show...results that have life long implications...we thought about our Zambian friends who don't want to get tested if there are not medications available or the hidden lifestyle choices that might be revealed and disapproved of in DuPage County by people they are close to in their lives...it served as an experience producing empathy and understanding for those who may be dealing with the impact of this virus...and hopefully produces an opportunity to speak into the lives of those who may need to be tested and helps encourage all types of folks to get tested and know their status and reduce the stigma that still unfortunately is part of cultures all across the world...
My counselor motioned for me to go back into the room with her and she asked me to sit down and looked at my results one more time...there was a split second where I found myself wondering "WHAT IF" even on a personal level before she told me my result was that I was negative in terms of my HIV status...and despite the fact that I knew logically that would be the case, it again allowed me to experience a taste of what it feels like to be that person wondering in that moment...as I walked out of the office after thanking her for the service she had provided me there were a few things that stuck with me after getting tested:
1. It is powerful and meaningful to enter into positive shared experiences so we can build rapport and get on the same ground when we have opportunity to not stay at a distance from those who we care about but may have different life experiences...
2. Getting tested and discovering your status in terms of HIV is easy to do and is something everyone should consider doing, especially if you have any doubt about what your status might be, regardless of what you think others might think of your behavioral choices
3. Choosing to live by the vision God has set out in Scripture for relationships is an aid in maintaining health and peace in our own personal lives
4. AIDS is an issue that we must not ignore in Africa, in Washington DC, in our own neighborhood...it deserves our attention, education, compassion, and action...
5. You cannot live life based on the fears of what others might think about you when you know you should do the right thing regardless of their possible reaction and response...living in the light rather than the dark is always the best choice...
It was a morning I won't soon forget...and one I hope many others will soon count as a shared experience with me in the days to come...
This morning I drove over to Wheaton College and picked up a good friend, one of my former students, and we headed over on a very cold Chicago morning to the DuPage County Health Department offices. We had both been there before to get shots before heading to Africa, but this visit was a little different. We were there to take an HIV test so we would know our status in relationship to having the presence of HIV antibodies on our body. Now to be honest, both of us admittedly felt a bit strange doing this at first. And even for many who might regularly read this blog you may very well think that it was an even stranger thing for us to do.
It was something that both of us wanted to do and felt like we needed to do as people who have been and continue to be deeply concerned about the issue of HIV/AIDS both in Africa and here in America. And yet to be honest, as an evangelical Christian it might seem to many of my friends like something unnecessary or perhaps even unthinkable due to the nature of the HIV virus being most often transmitted here in America through sexual contact or intravenous drug use involving needles due to most of the cases of mother to child transmission through birth or breast milk being prevented through medical care. (although not always the case) We both essentially had zero risk factors for testing positive because of our lack of drug use and choosing to abstain from sex till marriage and only having sex with a spouse for a lifetime up till this point. These decisions have come from our own decisions to seek to with the help of God's grace to pursue this lifestyle out of what we believe our faith as a Christ follower calls us to do. And yet these lifestyle choices are obviously not shared or embraced or acted out by many of our friends and fellow human beings who we love, care about, and want to be healthy...
We have both seen and heard about the incredible fear and stigma and even discrimination that takes place with those who are HIV positive, along with the very real physical impact and suffering that many living with HIV or AIDS are experiencing worldwide...more than anything else related to this disease, I long for the prevention of contracting AIDS and to stop its spread for people both in Africa and here in the USA and Chicago...and for those who are HIV positive but do not know it yet I want them to immediately get the medicines needed to help them stay healthy and be able to feel good about themselves and their role in society...and these critical things cannot happen if people do not feel free or comfortable to get tested and know their own status...and if people like me and you are willing to get tested, we can make it more normal, more accepted, and less scary for anyone who wants to know if they are HIV positive, and even more acceptable to talk about this disease so we can help reduce the infection rate of this life-changing disease...
Here is my experience this morning...even as we walked into the health department building, I found myself three times in a row having to tell different folks that I wanted to get an HIV test, and wondering just a bit what they were thinking about me...but to be honest, I didn't feel hesitant or ashamed because I knew it was a good thing for me to do...I was brought into a private room and was asked a series of questions concerning my risk factors and given basic information about HIV and what would happen if the result was positive...they even took down my address because sometimes people don't stay around to hear the results in the 20 minute period while you wait for your results...my counselor was a very nice young lady who seemed both surprised and pleased at how I answered the questions about my sexual experiences and needle use...I know she was actually quite overwhelmed when my 21 year old friend told her he was a virgin...after a finger poke I walked out to the waiting area where she would come find me with the results after the 20 minutes needed to do the analysis of my blood in a quick rapid test...(by the way, the test was free, I was treated very well, and I just walked in and was out in under an hour)
As I sat in the waiting room chair I thought and chatted with my friend about what these moments must feel like for those who were unsure or fearful about what the results might show...results that have life long implications...we thought about our Zambian friends who don't want to get tested if there are not medications available or the hidden lifestyle choices that might be revealed and disapproved of in DuPage County by people they are close to in their lives...it served as an experience producing empathy and understanding for those who may be dealing with the impact of this virus...and hopefully produces an opportunity to speak into the lives of those who may need to be tested and helps encourage all types of folks to get tested and know their status and reduce the stigma that still unfortunately is part of cultures all across the world...
My counselor motioned for me to go back into the room with her and she asked me to sit down and looked at my results one more time...there was a split second where I found myself wondering "WHAT IF" even on a personal level before she told me my result was that I was negative in terms of my HIV status...and despite the fact that I knew logically that would be the case, it again allowed me to experience a taste of what it feels like to be that person wondering in that moment...as I walked out of the office after thanking her for the service she had provided me there were a few things that stuck with me after getting tested:
1. It is powerful and meaningful to enter into positive shared experiences so we can build rapport and get on the same ground when we have opportunity to not stay at a distance from those who we care about but may have different life experiences...
2. Getting tested and discovering your status in terms of HIV is easy to do and is something everyone should consider doing, especially if you have any doubt about what your status might be, regardless of what you think others might think of your behavioral choices
3. Choosing to live by the vision God has set out in Scripture for relationships is an aid in maintaining health and peace in our own personal lives
4. AIDS is an issue that we must not ignore in Africa, in Washington DC, in our own neighborhood...it deserves our attention, education, compassion, and action...
5. You cannot live life based on the fears of what others might think about you when you know you should do the right thing regardless of their possible reaction and response...living in the light rather than the dark is always the best choice...
It was a morning I won't soon forget...and one I hope many others will soon count as a shared experience with me in the days to come...
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